Dear diary,


                      today I feel fucking messed, in the morning my parents mad with me with no reason
in the evening "mom" abuse me coz I don't do what she told, I mean I want to but I have my own damn works.school sucks my grade going down and she complaining


                       Dammit! can I had my own day where i could get out of this shit for once!
I need rest! I need a break! I mean what the fuck


                    she told me to get out of the house and not to use any clothes ! WTF!


I really hope I could had a normal mother like other's :( My life is a fucking mess, fucking living hell and I can't escape , I try suicide but I feel thats not enough :'(. Nothing is enough to erase my pain

Thing I need right now is a hug

fuckin parents always blame me for everything and treat me like m the worst thing

                                        they always call me name and blame  me for everything without 

even think how I feel about it and it hurt like a bitch and say that I always un polite while they always... you   know.....I hate them...they make me hate my life and make me feel like I am worthless 

 

I'm a live my life, have my fun, act like I don't give a fuck
Live my life, have my fun, smoke like I don't give a fuck
Live my life, have my fun, fuck that shit, you only get one
Fuck that shit, I gotta sip some
I gotta bitch leaving, I gotta bitch coming (Aye)
I'm getting more pop on my skateboard,
Niggas don't want me to pop like a bungee cord
I got my redbone hair gone
That Bugatti go skirt like the legs showing
You think you street? I'm a jaywalker
I'm a basket case, where the fucking lawyer?
Yeah, Tunechi lee in this motherfucker
Niggas fuck with me in this motherfucker
I'm a smoke until I get lung trouble
And these... niggas saying they the truth
But your pants on fire
Like I was born in the pool
I came up from the bottom
I'm a live my life, have my fun, skate like I don't give a fuck
Keep a brand new bitch, bout to get her ribbon cut
Rich, but I ain't rich enough
Your bitch is down, you bitchin up
Rolls Royce, topless, is bout to get tittie fucked

[Verse 2: Euro]
Okay, live my life, have no fun, 'less you give my niggas some
Live my life, what the fuck, can't recall me giving one
Live my life, have my fun, fuck like I don't give a fuck
And question, who the realest niggas?
Okay, that's a given one
Well welcome to the murder show
Show starts when the curtains close
Pass the scalpel to me, on my open-hearted surgeon flow
Why are all these coppers trippin?
Bitches down there, searching clothes
Yeah, I'm drinking stupid
What the fuck you think I'm swerving for?
Look, I be with that nigga from New Orleans
Who be asking if you heard me, even though he wasn't talking
Seen a straight chick do some dyke shit and didn't pause
And she was probably brokenhearted
I'm so gone, I probably caused it
I'm just saying
They ain't fucking with me
Bet they talking bout murdering me
But, look, Tune, I just don't see the killer in these niggas
2Pac's hologram was realer than these niggas

[Verse 3: T@]
I'm a get this money, live my life and ball like I don't give a fuck
Get this money, live my life and ball like I don't give a fuck
Get this money, live my life and ball like I don't give a fuck
Rudy Gays up on the coupe, and Black Mambas on the Truk
I'm a dream chaser for stacking cheddar
I'm in my Olympic Dream Team's Retros Number 7s
What you know about getting money?
Hop out the coupe, I got your bitch in there, I leave the engine running
I hit the block, talk shit, roll a few stogies
Pop a bar, kill a lil' time on my Rollie
David Copperfield, I make a hundred disappear
Like I know magic, but ball like Jordan
Nigga hating on my new deal, James Harden
I guess cause I'm the shit, and you lil' niggas fartin'
With the weed, I did coke numbers, real talk
A buck fifty every three months, real talk

[Verse 4: Lil Wayne]
W-T-F, what the fuck nigga?
Tell them fuck niggas get the fuck nigga
Now who the fuck is with the fuck nigga?
It's just us, it's just us nigga
We the fuss nigga
That's a plus nigga
And we don't fuck with snitches trying to bust niggas
So tell them fuck niggas get the fuck nigga
I'm a live my life, have my fun, skate like I don't give a fuck
Live my life, have my fun, act like I don't give a fuck
Get this money, live my life, and ball like I don't give a fuck
Smoke weed with the windows up
High as fuck, but inching up
Pussy niggas tensing up
Are these niggas men or what?
I got your bitch antenas up
You can judge us, but don't sentence us
Blow me like the wind would gust
We trukfit and we supered up
W-T-F, who to fuck?

[Outro: Lil Wayne]
And this, bitch I'm rolling with is cute
And her ass on fire
And the whole time, I ain't feel a tooth
Then I ate that pussy 'til I lost a diamond and I'm gone...

PARENTS!! PARENTS!

I FUCKING HATE PARENT!!
THEY FORCE ME TO BE PERFECT!
I CAN'T! I wanna cry! but I am not!
they don't deserve my tears! they don't know the value of it!
They will never know the value of me until they lose me !

Parents suck!

WTF?! I can't be perfect! but they always force me to , and if I don't they will beat me...
My only source of happiness is my phone..and they fuckin take it!
I swear ! If they fuckin sell it, I am gonna kill myself..
I mean, no one ever help me...no one here for me...only my phone!
my phone is where I find happiness
my phone have music,1D,Ed sheeran, Demi lovato, and games
I can't live without it! My life gonna be living hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Still alive

yeah so ..I scared my parents will find out about my mark, its not perfect..oh crap! they will beat me !
Someone help me! I want to die!

I can't

I don't think I can do this anymore...
I promise him I will survive, but I can't
I am not typical girl who like to lie..NO!
I always do my promise..but I can't do this..
Anyone?! Save me!

MP3 !!

http://scmplayer.net/#skin=http://static.tumblr.com/ntstnli/FUbmkfpgk/rabiscos.css

believe me its cool as fuck

Yeah I am talking to myself, right?! No one read this..

no one care about me..
NO ONE! and its kill me
everyone came then leave
no one stay..

My fear

My biggest fear is when people suddenly leave me without reason    Hello guys, today I wanna tell u about my biggest fear, so yeah, my biggest fear is losing people who are important to me.. it happen several time but it still be my biggest fear all the time.

The truth

the truth is people used to bully me in the past
and its still hurt..like seriously..
now I am know as a good girl..but they don't know anything about me
and I believe soon they all will leave me alone and bully me

Think before u speak

words hurt people
it dangerous
u have to be careful with words
one word can kill somebody
a single world mean much
u don't know how a single little things can hurt someone
so please think before u speak

I am weak and sensitive

It is sad because its true


 

No it's not stupid

People say " they are stupid! why they have to committing suicide! committing suicide is stupid!"

well, take a look at the picture !

You don't know what they went through! so don't judge

Don't judge me

 no! don't judge me
you never through the way I through
u never feel what I feel
so please don't start to judge me

you wouldn't understand
and I can't explain

y

I known as people who always give good advice
and stop people from committing suicide
but here am I ..
people who can't save myself
and always committing suicide

How it started

 I have abusive parents, they always tell me to be perfect and else and hit me when I don't.

Then I lost best friend.
They betray me.

I have no one to hold on.
I think, I could hold on to one direction.
well yeah , but only for a while..
but they do save my life..
How?
At least I think  there are somebody who care..

I always give anything whatever it cost to make my best friend happy...
but..
they betray me..


people say, God's first gift is parent
well haha, no! My parents is abusive
they always hit me and angry to me
they love my sisters but not me

I then realized, no one want me
no one care about me..
so why not die? everyone care when its too late, right?!

There how it start..how my life changes to living hell

Introduction

Hello guys, 

My name is Michelle

I am 15 years old

So this is a blog where I tell what happen "behind the scene" A.K.A my unexpected sight.

People know me as a nice , caring , and loved 

but they don't know how my life "behind the scene"

they don't know about the cut

they don't know about how I hate myself

they don't know how bad I want to die

they don't know how I starved

I am not living just surviving

monster inside me eat me inside

NO,happily ever after never exist for me

some girl aren't meant to be princess,they meant to be warrior 

so here is my story...